Just because you can't play your instruments, doesn't make it art.

A wise man once said. I smell suck. It's everywhere!

One month til:

Dear Mister Snider,

I'm not a huge Christmas fan. Because of this, the media tries to make me feel like a heartless evil person. But I'm not gonna take it. Nonetheless, I will always have enough love in my heart for you, Dee.

Love Always,
me

PS- Andrew Gormley loves saying the word 'cunt', particularly on live radio. Please make him stop, before he ruins my career!

She-pimp

,I'm not your.

Oh, Le Tigre. So high energy. Too intense to listen to at work. I had to put in Badly Drawn Boy to calm me down a bit. I'm feeling very excited these days. Last night we started recording 2 more songs for the album. Andrew makes me play riffs so many times; I don't know which of us is more perfectionist. Recording makes me feel like a child with an extreme case of ADD. Luckily, Dennis had some Blender magazines to keep me occuppied: Did you know that Frank Sinatra married Mia Farrow, and Ava Gardner (former wife) made fun of her short hair by calling her a 'little boy'? hah. Have you ever seen a picture of Boy George without his intense eye liner and make up? It's SCARY. I will never do smack because of that image alone. fuck.

Parka City.

Pet-peeve of the day/year: carrying a little purse while wearing a backpack. Why are you carrying that? Jesus Christ. Just put it in your backpack. Surely there's room. There has to be. You look silly. Oh, I see...you think it's 'cute'. Stop the useless vanity!

PARTY AT BRENT/CHRIS'/JEREMY's ON FRIDAY!

Burning bridges! What is this?!! 1950?!!!
Get back in line!!!! You're ruining our bureaucracy!!!!
You've got to be kidding.

Needless to say, the meeting with the head of HR was total bullshit yesterday.
My option (and note the singular form):
Put on a good face and stop questioning the system or else you'll burn your bridges...Or better yet, we'll burn them for you.... Oh look, we just did. You're dead.


(In Calum's words:) Good.


Moving on. Andrew and I commence recording the official HOTSHOTROBOT CD this week. I've been working on 2 new songs avec vigor.

This morning I've listened to:
KNA ep
Brainiac- Bonsai Superstar
HOTSHOTROBOT demo (number #17 on the ckdu charts this week ahem)- (self indulgently, yes)

After hearing our demo for the first time in quite awhile, I'm hoping that we will find some time to re-record those 3 songs for the album. So if you have a copy, consider it rare! Make a time capsule!

Speaking of Charts, I think they are so funny.
I remember when we were loading gear for our Dog Day show back in September, somehow little Marc from Bad Motels ended up helping us,and the following conversation took place:

Mark: Congrats, I see Dog Day on the Charts again
KC: Yah, we've been bouncing around on that thing for months... I'm beginning to get a little sick of it...
Mark: Really?

Totally! For a moment I was jealous, infuriated, envious and filled with intense admiration-all at the same time. Sick of being on the charts? This is fantastic! Surely this is a fate destined for me as well. Incredible, KC...Totally!

Things I learned this weekend:
Johnny Cash is cool... with an asterisk.
Red Wine does not helps headaches, however whiskey does.
If you wear body butter, certain dogs will lick you uncontrollably.
I now have the coolest red party dress. Ever.
There are no Bow Wow Wow cds in this city.

Later, bitches.

XTC Party, Location: My Desk

The divine forces of the universe have saved my sanity via XTC.

Office. Politics. Suck. Ass. My 'extended' contract ends December 14. A few collegues have written letters on my behalf objecting to the union policy. Since then, my daily life has turned into an on-going episode of office Survivor: whispers, closed door meetings, alliances...low to moderate hostility. The Deans are not appreciating the pressure being put on them. Yesterday I was reminded with smile,

You're welcome to leave at any time, you know!
*insert fake mutal laughter here*

You see, in office world, every conflict is masked in fake sentiment. It is completley imparative that the continuum of fake positivity is sustained. If not, NASA..err I mean FGS will explode. Since I was blessed with a huge ego, this doesn't really jive with how my mind operates:

Suck my hairy nonexistant cock balls! Of course I want out of here! But that won't pay my rent, you shit!

The longer these thoughts are supressed, the possibility of me going postal continues to augment. I need to leave before I experience a for-real segment of Dave Chappelle's When keeping it real, goes all wrong. Seriously, readers. Yesterday was close.

This morning to work I was listening to Black Sea in full for the first time.

Don't lose your temper:

Don't lose your temper
Don't lose your temper
Don't lose your temper
'Cos I love you when you're wild
Don't lose your temper
Don't lose your temper
Don't lose your temper
'Cos I'd hate you to grow mild
Since you took that job with a company
You've changed so much you just won't recognize me
They have you dressed up like a secretary
You mustn't change the things that make you what you are
Since you've been listening to that linguaphone
You're speaking in a voice that is not your own
I'm not sure if it's you when I call home
You mustn't change the things that make you what you are
Whatever happened to my fighting, biting, lightning lioness
Little girl, little girl, little girl, little girl
I think I preferred it when your hair was in a mess
Brittle girl, brittle girl
They're not your real curls
Don't lose it
Don't lose it
Don't lose it
Don't lose it

I'm so done with this. To celebrate, there will be a non-stop XTC party at my desk for T-minus 20 work days until Yuppie Jen is dead.
See you next round, office bitches. You're going to be working for me.

mes·cal ( P ) Pronunciation Key (ms-kl) also mez·cal (mz-kl)
n.
See peyote.

A Mexican liquor distilled from the fermented juice of certain species of agave.

We're almost to the bottom of the bottle. Worm night 2005 is a certainty at this point.

You can't write a fortune in present tense/Sticking it to the man: Enjoy more, work less.

You are a person of culture. That's my fortune; I don't dispute it as a statement but it's certainly not a fortune.

I have lots to talk about today since I've awaken from my semi-coma of last week's strep thoat-ige. But I don't feel like being chronological about it. And its going to be long. No complaining, I know you love this shit.

I've recently been informed that when my contract is up I won't even be considered to be hired because I'm not in 'the union'. For those of you who don't know, I've worked at the prestigous D-univeristy in the same office the last few years as a student, and after I graduated, full-time to save their asses when the Thesis Co-ordinator moved away suddenly. Its a serious upper-administrative job; instantly my year off from school-which was supposed to be about creative freedom and music, has turned into slaving away to the demands and whims of PhD students and Faculty alike. At first, I was outraged when I heard my resume was held hostage at HR, to ensure that a lazy union slob who probably never got a degree can have my job. I'm now relieved to get the hell out of here. This job is so '26' and I'm only 22. I have to work less and enjoy more. I tried to find humour in the situation when the news was broken to me:

Well, I guess I can only hope that a single mother of 4 gets my job; at least that way perhaps I won't be so hateful about the unfairness of this situation...

No one was amused by my comment. Nobody appreciates a single mother joke these days-its SO un-PC.

Nonetheless, favorite quotes Thesis Co-ordinator 2005:

From A half-assed apology letter from a Professor who freaked out at me 'Here's Johnny!'-style about the legitimacy of title case:

In looking out for the best interests of my students and the quality of
their science, I neglected to look out for your best interests and the
quality of your professionalism. That was wrong of me and not at all
professional (i.e. complete jerk).

and of course, from the creepy A/V guy:

What's your sign? [in an astrological sense]

There you go, man. I stuck it to you.

Moving on, this weekend was completly, totally fun. I was so stoked to be out and feeling marginally better, so I partied away (most of) my strep thoat. Pixies on Thursday was phemonenal. If you missed it, you're an i.e. complete jerk. I'm so happy when my near and dear south end affiliates get the attention they deserve. Jeremy stole the show! In fact, everyone was in their element. I was so happy to have Calum as a partner in crime because he always laughs at my obnoxious comments, i.e: Jesus. Who invited Ashely Simpson?

Saturday was little Marc's birthday and I bought him an array of guitar picks because he asked me to:

Me: Do you have any guitar picks?
Guitar store man: Ummmmm YES.
Me: Can I see them?
Git man: What kind?
Me: I don't know.
Git man: what? [puzzled]
Me: It's a gift. What are, you know, the good kind.
Git man: Guitar picks are very personalized. It completly depends on the person [exasperated and thinks I'm a total idiot at this point]. You'd just be guessing really.
Me: Hm. Well, fair enough. I'll take this one for starters, because it has a Rhino on it.

The party was fun, even though Brad kept disappearing (again) to be a whore. On a whim I decided to go to Controller.Controller instead of GnR tribute. There were so many people there, yet somehow I knew no one! Ben was in the same boat, so I chatted with him for awhile until the pervasiveness of the torontoness/college-crowd became too much. Such a weird crowd. I gave him a highfive for paying a portion of his rent (again) and left. Ben also taught me a lesson in how to be an asshole:use email. Or better yet, agree to something and provide no means of contact.

Sunday I watched the Fashion Television network all day at Colum's and was snuggled and fed lovely meals.

'Flection's tonight?

Your Goddamn fucking emo poster is sucks/ Yay! Chart!

Yes, is sucks. It doesn't even makes sense. Whose, you ask? I'm not telling. But its red. Bleh. Irritiable. Slightly agitated that I can't sing tonight. Hungry. These things and more I am. Look I've caught emo, talking about my feelings and what not. JESUS!

But, in exciting news, HOTSHOTROBOT has hit the charts: http://www.earshot-online.com/charts/ckdu.cfm


This makes me very happy. I didn't think we could do this without a real album. 'Demo EP'as a title is what Dan would call punk as fuck (in a minimalist sense). It's what I would call, we didn't title it. So stoked.

It was Calum who first pointed out that I was abrasive.

Surprisingly, at the time, I was quite shocked at this revelation. I am no longer.

Dear Calum,

How are you? I miss you. I've been sick all week with strep throat. I've always wondered: would being delirious make me more or less abrasive?

Yesterday, I dropped my prescription off at Lawtons. I've always found it so sketch there, but its in the same building as my doctor's, so I figured why not. Apparently, it would take 20 minutes. That's fine.

So I sat on a square of faux leather, feavered and delirious, and waited, and waited. It had now been 20 minutes. An older lady approched the counter in front of me. She was so mini and had a little cane and could barely walk. A fat pharmacist lumbered over to the counter:

Oh, Ms. ____, its you. Well I can't go over this right now, she huffed while gesturing at the prescription.
Insert fat lady huff x3.
Well you did call twice already. Fine. I'll look. Huff. No. Huff. I can't do this right now. Come back this afternoon.
And then the fat fuck pharmacist walked behind the counter and popped a chocolate in her mouth.

The little mini lady meekly left. I couldn't believe it. I was so fucking mad!

So then the man pharmacist came over asked my name; apparently my prescription would be awhile longer.

Ok.

And then I realized: NO. It was not ok.

I walked in front of the cough medicine shelf where the pharmacists were standing behind and said:

-Actually, I'd like my prescription back.
-It'll only be a few more minutes.
-No. I didn't like how she (pointing) treated that lady. That was rude. I can't believe you treat older customers like that. Show. Some. Respect. Quite frankly, that was so rude, I was disgusted. I'm taking this to Shoppers.

The man pharmacist looked at me, nodding, saying ok...ok...ok. He looked like he was afraid I was going to stick up the place or something. Or kill him.

I left, proud to have gotten my point accross without the word/s bitch/cunt/cock/fucker.

Calum, can I be considered a martyr if I'm this abrasive? Probably not.

Talk to you soon,
JMAN

I was talking to peachy-peach about kissy kiss

This is going to be fun. I get to sing Gigantic and Tony's Theme.

KNA EP Release Tonight!!!!!!!!!!!!! (w/hotshotrobot, spincycle^2, The Tragedies)

This is tonight. I haven't been this excited for a show since ever. Well, maybe our first show.
Since this is going to be our last chance to play at the Seahorse potentially ever, I intend on being out of control. Since I'm normally out of control without specific intentions, things may get crazy.

I'm so happy for Dan. He is one of the most under-rated musicians in the city. While other fucktards fuck around and do little musically (in a original or inspiring way) and indulge in their own trendiness and get scores of attention from/for being like the other fucktards who fuck around and do little musicially (in a original or inspiring way)and indulge in their own trendiness,
Dan breaks this cycle of suck. He does his own thing and works hard.
Props Danton.